Right now, I'm friggin' alone and cold in the library. Where are you when I need a warm hug?
When I doubt myself, where are you when I need someone to tell me I'm good?
When I hate myself, where are you when I need someone to tell me that I'm being loved?
When I cry, where are you when I need the shoulder to cry on?
When I die, where are you when I need someone to put a stalk of white rose in my crossed palms?
Where are you, when I need you the most? But I know, I'm talking to the air now. Such person just don't exist anymore. Not anymore in my life.
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Monday, March 29, 2010
恋爱就只是这样吗?
A:她：“老公。帮我接杯水呗。”
他：“石头剪子布。谁输了谁去。”
她：“算了。我自己去吧。”
B:他们坐在一起看韩剧。她起身。他问“干吗去？”
她：“去接杯水。”
他：“你坐这看吧。我去给你接。”
女人要求不高，她对男人唯一的要求就是“疼她”
你可以什么都没有，只要你疼她，她就有足够的勇气把自己的下半辈子交给你。
A:他晚上下班。给她打电话“宝贝儿。我晚上和朋友出去吃饭."
她：“你不是答应我陪我逛街的吗？”
他：“改天吧！”
她默默地流泪。为什么每次都是这样？
B:他下班的时候打电话给她:“亲爱的。别人给我一张奥运会的票。巴西队啊！一会儿我去
看球了啊。”
她：“哦。这样啊。好吧。”
他：“怎么不高兴了？”
她：“你忘了。上周说好今天我朋友和她男朋友请我俩吃饭啊。”
他：“哎呀。对不起亲爱的。我忘记了。那我把票给别人吧。我陪你去吃饭。”
她：“不要了。吃饭可以改天。或者你先去看。我们等你。”
他：“那不行。答应你的事情必须得做到。再说你自己跟他俩在一起像电灯泡似的。你肯定不舒服啊”
她：“没事……”
没等她说完，他很强势的告诉她“好了，听我的，你收拾一下，我一会儿去接你。”
其实女人不是不懂事，只是她需要碰上一个懂事的男人，其实情侣之间是可以互相的。
A:他：“我晚上出去吃饭了啊。”
她：“几点回家？”
他：“九点之前肯定回家。”
九点半，她：“你怎么还不回来啊？”
他：“十点。肯定回家。”
十一点。十二点。一点。两点……
后来，她不再打电话催他，因为她知道，对于不守承诺的男人，一切“肯定”都是“未必”。
B:他：“我晚上出去吃饭。九点之前肯定结束。然后我俩去看电影。”
她：“你能那么快就结束吗？”
他：“放心吧。我答应你了就一定能！”
快到九点的时候。他：“收拾一下吧。我马上就到你家了”
信任，是在一件一件小事中建立起来的。
A:她生理期。身体不舒服。顶着疼痛洗衣服。收拾屋子。
他坐在电脑前面玩网络游戏。
她干完活。躺在床上。长出了一口气。
他看了她一眼：“宝贝儿。辛苦了！”然后转过头。继续玩他的游戏。
B:她生理期。很难受。起身准备洗衣服。
他拽住她：“你去床上躺着。我来！”
她：“你会做家务吗？你自己洗过衣服吗？”
他：“不会做可以学着做啊。以后你身体不舒服的时候。我当然得独挡一面！”
女人需要的不只是甜言蜜语，哄她几句，她也许会给你一个微笑
但是实实在在的呵护，她会对你一辈子的感恩，并且会回报给你一个温暖的家。
A:她给他拿了一包榛子。然后她去洗衣服。
回来的时候。榛子已经被他吃得所剩无几。
B:她拿给他一包榛子。然后自己去收拾屋子。
回来的时候。她看见电脑前面放了一堆剥好的榛子仁。
女人很感性。她炫耀你对她的体贴，就好像炫耀克拉钻一样。
这么廉价的买卖，用一点心思就能收获无比的财富。
A:他说：“你是最好的。”
她问：“我哪好？”
他：“学历高、能力强、长得漂亮、对我又这么好。”
她笑了。
B:他：“你是我所遇到最好的女孩儿。”
她：“我哪好？”
他：“你对身边的每个人都很友善、很无私、对人对生活总是很感恩、一个人有一颗善良的心、会让周围的人感觉到温暖，你是我见过最善良的女孩儿，伤害你的人都应该下地狱！”
她哭了。
一个人，是因为你对他好，所以觉得你好。
一个人，是因为懂得你的好，所以想要对你好。
幸福的恋人，首先应该是一对彼此欣赏的知己。
他：“石头剪子布。谁输了谁去。”
她：“算了。我自己去吧。”
B:他们坐在一起看韩剧。她起身。他问“干吗去？”
她：“去接杯水。”
他：“你坐这看吧。我去给你接。”
女人要求不高，她对男人唯一的要求就是“疼她”
你可以什么都没有，只要你疼她，她就有足够的勇气把自己的下半辈子交给你。
A:他晚上下班。给她打电话“宝贝儿。我晚上和朋友出去吃饭."
她：“你不是答应我陪我逛街的吗？”
他：“改天吧！”
她默默地流泪。为什么每次都是这样？
B:他下班的时候打电话给她:“亲爱的。别人给我一张奥运会的票。巴西队啊！一会儿我去
看球了啊。”
她：“哦。这样啊。好吧。”
他：“怎么不高兴了？”
她：“你忘了。上周说好今天我朋友和她男朋友请我俩吃饭啊。”
他：“哎呀。对不起亲爱的。我忘记了。那我把票给别人吧。我陪你去吃饭。”
她：“不要了。吃饭可以改天。或者你先去看。我们等你。”
他：“那不行。答应你的事情必须得做到。再说你自己跟他俩在一起像电灯泡似的。你肯定不舒服啊”
她：“没事……”
没等她说完，他很强势的告诉她“好了，听我的，你收拾一下，我一会儿去接你。”
其实女人不是不懂事，只是她需要碰上一个懂事的男人，其实情侣之间是可以互相的。
A:他：“我晚上出去吃饭了啊。”
她：“几点回家？”
他：“九点之前肯定回家。”
九点半，她：“你怎么还不回来啊？”
他：“十点。肯定回家。”
十一点。十二点。一点。两点……
后来，她不再打电话催他，因为她知道，对于不守承诺的男人，一切“肯定”都是“未必”。
B:他：“我晚上出去吃饭。九点之前肯定结束。然后我俩去看电影。”
她：“你能那么快就结束吗？”
他：“放心吧。我答应你了就一定能！”
快到九点的时候。他：“收拾一下吧。我马上就到你家了”
信任，是在一件一件小事中建立起来的。
A:她生理期。身体不舒服。顶着疼痛洗衣服。收拾屋子。
他坐在电脑前面玩网络游戏。
她干完活。躺在床上。长出了一口气。
他看了她一眼：“宝贝儿。辛苦了！”然后转过头。继续玩他的游戏。
B:她生理期。很难受。起身准备洗衣服。
他拽住她：“你去床上躺着。我来！”
她：“你会做家务吗？你自己洗过衣服吗？”
他：“不会做可以学着做啊。以后你身体不舒服的时候。我当然得独挡一面！”
女人需要的不只是甜言蜜语，哄她几句，她也许会给你一个微笑
但是实实在在的呵护，她会对你一辈子的感恩，并且会回报给你一个温暖的家。
A:她给他拿了一包榛子。然后她去洗衣服。
回来的时候。榛子已经被他吃得所剩无几。
B:她拿给他一包榛子。然后自己去收拾屋子。
回来的时候。她看见电脑前面放了一堆剥好的榛子仁。
女人很感性。她炫耀你对她的体贴，就好像炫耀克拉钻一样。
这么廉价的买卖，用一点心思就能收获无比的财富。
A:他说：“你是最好的。”
她问：“我哪好？”
他：“学历高、能力强、长得漂亮、对我又这么好。”
她笑了。
B:他：“你是我所遇到最好的女孩儿。”
她：“我哪好？”
他：“你对身边的每个人都很友善、很无私、对人对生活总是很感恩、一个人有一颗善良的心、会让周围的人感觉到温暖，你是我见过最善良的女孩儿，伤害你的人都应该下地狱！”
她哭了。
一个人，是因为你对他好，所以觉得你好。
一个人，是因为懂得你的好，所以想要对你好。
幸福的恋人，首先应该是一对彼此欣赏的知己。
Friday, March 26, 2010
81st Post
I thought I could be distracted, but I was proven wrong. Some say absent let the heart grows fonder, now I truly feel that. For you absence, is definitely missed.
It's been quite some time since I hear your voice, how are you?
It's now end of the month, so I guess you're busy period will end soon. I hope everything's fine for you, you really should take care.
I have been keeping things with myself recently. I've given myself a period of time to wait for you, at least a call, or a message. If you really can't make it, then I guess it's the end for all my waiting. But I'm still not certain if I can do that to you, but I shall try, because I think I have to do them eventually.
But right now, I still miss you, a lot. I still wonder what are you doing everyday, are you eating well? Are you sleeping well?
J.N. I miss you lots here. Do you feel the same too?
It's been quite some time since I hear your voice, how are you?
It's now end of the month, so I guess you're busy period will end soon. I hope everything's fine for you, you really should take care.
I have been keeping things with myself recently. I've given myself a period of time to wait for you, at least a call, or a message. If you really can't make it, then I guess it's the end for all my waiting. But I'm still not certain if I can do that to you, but I shall try, because I think I have to do them eventually.
But right now, I still miss you, a lot. I still wonder what are you doing everyday, are you eating well? Are you sleeping well?
J.N. I miss you lots here. Do you feel the same too?
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Hmph...
I really should not think too much.. I shouldn't..
The nice long conversation during dinner really seduced me to the max.. It was at the tip of my mouth to ask. But I managed to stop myself, from creating such an embarassing moment with him.. Darn.. It was like real close, luckily the words didn't spilt out yet.. If not I'll definitely lose a friend.. =(
Today was as usual, sitting in the library silently with him. I guess library is a good place to do stuff, and to stalk on people you have a crush on..Haha.. But he's definitely not to be disturbed.. He looked so stress.. >.<
I really should stop all this.. It's not healthy at all..
* He smokes Malboro, kinda cool.. LOL.. *
The nice long conversation during dinner really seduced me to the max.. It was at the tip of my mouth to ask. But I managed to stop myself, from creating such an embarassing moment with him.. Darn.. It was like real close, luckily the words didn't spilt out yet.. If not I'll definitely lose a friend.. =(
Today was as usual, sitting in the library silently with him. I guess library is a good place to do stuff, and to stalk on people you have a crush on..Haha.. But he's definitely not to be disturbed.. He looked so stress.. >.<
I really should stop all this.. It's not healthy at all..
* He smokes Malboro, kinda cool.. LOL.. *
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
In Library
Claire De Lune can really make me turn blue. *sigh*
I was hoping to see him today, since I have my 4 hours break in between my class. So I thought I can bring my laptop and do my work with him. But when I stepped in the library, I looked around. He's not here. Then I waited till now, he's still not in sight.
He must be busy for his FYP, I can totally understand. Tomorrow is the due date. But why am I still feeling a bit lost, and somehow disappointed?
I must really control my emotions. He's just a friend, and I promised myself no more than that. He's leaving the country soon, what am I thinking?
Debussy is really a genius. He can mess around my mind with his Claire De Lune.
I was hoping to see him today, since I have my 4 hours break in between my class. So I thought I can bring my laptop and do my work with him. But when I stepped in the library, I looked around. He's not here. Then I waited till now, he's still not in sight.
He must be busy for his FYP, I can totally understand. Tomorrow is the due date. But why am I still feeling a bit lost, and somehow disappointed?
I must really control my emotions. He's just a friend, and I promised myself no more than that. He's leaving the country soon, what am I thinking?
Debussy is really a genius. He can mess around my mind with his Claire De Lune.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
TianYu, my new friend =)
And it's good to know that when you just got dumped.. And the person you're waiting for keep giving you a cold shoulder.. =)
I'm happy that I can still do something crazy with my friends, despite the fact that I'm not really in a gay-ish mood.. =P
It was definitely something spontaneous. I never know that things could turn out well. I've only intended to let him know the existence of me, after 3 years of checking him out. But I would have never expected him to seriously reply, and willing to meet and talk to me in person! That was really the luckiest day after so many bad days that I've been through these few months. I'm pleased! =D
His name is TianYu, foreign student from China.. Too bad he's going to graduate soon and go back to his hometown.. And not coming back for graduation.. >.<
But at least he is a miracle for me after so long a time, he's undeniable my lucky charm.. I guest I can still ask him out when he's available.. We're going out for movies this weekend.. XD
TianYu, wish you luck in your FYP and future undertakings.. Jia You ~ ^_^
I'm happy that I can still do something crazy with my friends, despite the fact that I'm not really in a gay-ish mood.. =P
It was definitely something spontaneous. I never know that things could turn out well. I've only intended to let him know the existence of me, after 3 years of checking him out. But I would have never expected him to seriously reply, and willing to meet and talk to me in person! That was really the luckiest day after so many bad days that I've been through these few months. I'm pleased! =D
His name is TianYu, foreign student from China.. Too bad he's going to graduate soon and go back to his hometown.. And not coming back for graduation.. >.<
But at least he is a miracle for me after so long a time, he's undeniable my lucky charm.. I guest I can still ask him out when he's available.. We're going out for movies this weekend.. XD
TianYu, wish you luck in your FYP and future undertakings.. Jia You ~ ^_^
Friday, March 19, 2010
Block
Sometimes I see my old time friend's photos in facebook profile.. They all look so happy and contented.. Then I ask myself, what have I been doing so far? Why am I still here? Why am I unhappy?
These questions remained unanswered, and I remained unhappy.. I guess nothing can really help me out from this mud pool.. It's all psychological.. It's all up to myself..
My brain tells me to be rational, my heart tells me no.. Which one should I follow?
Then I look at myself again.. Not pretty, not exceptionally brilliant, not really with good personality.. I'll say, no wonder I'm being dumped.. They are all so perfect.. Who am I to compete with them? Friends tell me I'm just fine.. But still.. I just feel pure pathetic..
I know I'm not without the love from others.. But how long can they last? When I'm finish with what they want from me.. Will they still stay by my side when I need a friend or a company?
*Writer's Block*
I do need a man to love me afterall.
These questions remained unanswered, and I remained unhappy.. I guess nothing can really help me out from this mud pool.. It's all psychological.. It's all up to myself..
My brain tells me to be rational, my heart tells me no.. Which one should I follow?
Then I look at myself again.. Not pretty, not exceptionally brilliant, not really with good personality.. I'll say, no wonder I'm being dumped.. They are all so perfect.. Who am I to compete with them? Friends tell me I'm just fine.. But still.. I just feel pure pathetic..
I know I'm not without the love from others.. But how long can they last? When I'm finish with what they want from me.. Will they still stay by my side when I need a friend or a company?
*Writer's Block*
I do need a man to love me afterall.
男人 其实你不懂
女人不吵了、不闹了、不叫了，就是真的不爱了
女人说要离开，是伤心了，是你让他失望了.
女人明知道你们之间没有未来，却情愿留在你身边做个普通朋友，不是她太贱，只是她舍不得 .
女人故意在你面前提到别的男人，不是她花心，只是想要刺激一下你，让你多在乎她一点 .
女人不主动打电话、发信息给你，不是不想你，是她不够自信，你接到电话、短信时，是否也同样的想念她 .
如果女人不爱你，是不会对你发脾气的，不要报怨自己的女朋友脾气太怪，女人只对她爱的人发脾气.
女人不是不知道你还有别的女人，她选择独自伤心却不揭穿你，是害怕揭穿后给了你一个离开她的借口.
女人总是在你面前假装很开心，不是她没心没肺，成天傻乐，只是为了在你面前留下最美的样子.
男人 其实你不懂
1 她总是问:你在哪呢?你现在在干吗?
(她很想念你,只是想跟你说说话,你不给她发信息,她很矛盾,怕你在忙,但又忍不住想你.换了别人,爱干嘛干嘛,她不关心.所以请你一有时间就问候她一下,让她放心,让她知道你心里有她,她不会烦你.她总是主动联系你,她会觉得她贱.)
2 她说:我不开心了,我好烦.
(不要怪她无理取闹,更不能觉得她在烦你,她不是真的不开心,她只是想你了.只是想要你会来安慰她一下,哪怕是:乖,别闹了,听话!)
3 她说:不要感冒了./路上小心./自己多注意……
(不要嫌她烦.因为她知道你不傻,甚至是很聪明的.她只想让你知道她心里有你,她很想关心你)
4 她总说自己又长胖了或者长得不够漂亮.
(不要觉得她是在自卑或嫉妒别人,她只是怕自己在你眼中不够完美.她已经在为你改变了.)
5 她总说她想要帮你,要你有什么事一定要告诉她.
(其实她知道她帮不了你什么,她只想让你知道你还有她,她永远在会你身边陪你,会一直的支持你,)
6 她看到你跟别的女生亲近一些就会生气,发小脾气.
(别说她小气,不信任你,她其实是在吃醋,这表示她十分在乎你.即使心里难受也会自己安慰自己.)
7 无论做什么她总会征求你的意见.
(不是她没主见,太过依赖你,她只是尊重你,凡事以你为先.)
8 不管在哪里她总是紧紧的和你站在一起.
(她只是在告诉你她信任你.)
9 她爱忧伤,总是会多想.
(不要觉得她是想太多,只是有时她会觉得缺乏安全感.)
10 她假装生气转身离开.
(其实,她不是真的想走,只是离开的时候希望被挽留.)
11 她会突然冷淡你,或是向你撒娇.
(别怪她孩子气,她只是想让你哄哄她.)
12 也许有一天她会跟你说分手.
(其实,这个时候她已经喜欢你好久,只是不确定这份感情是不是对的.她只是要你的安全感,你的舍不得,你的不要走……）
女人说要离开，是伤心了，是你让他失望了.
女人明知道你们之间没有未来，却情愿留在你身边做个普通朋友，不是她太贱，只是她舍不得 .
女人故意在你面前提到别的男人，不是她花心，只是想要刺激一下你，让你多在乎她一点 .
女人不主动打电话、发信息给你，不是不想你，是她不够自信，你接到电话、短信时，是否也同样的想念她 .
如果女人不爱你，是不会对你发脾气的，不要报怨自己的女朋友脾气太怪，女人只对她爱的人发脾气.
女人不是不知道你还有别的女人，她选择独自伤心却不揭穿你，是害怕揭穿后给了你一个离开她的借口.
女人总是在你面前假装很开心，不是她没心没肺，成天傻乐，只是为了在你面前留下最美的样子.
男人 其实你不懂
1 她总是问:你在哪呢?你现在在干吗?
(她很想念你,只是想跟你说说话,你不给她发信息,她很矛盾,怕你在忙,但又忍不住想你.换了别人,爱干嘛干嘛,她不关心.所以请你一有时间就问候她一下,让她放心,让她知道你心里有她,她不会烦你.她总是主动联系你,她会觉得她贱.)
2 她说:我不开心了,我好烦.
(不要怪她无理取闹,更不能觉得她在烦你,她不是真的不开心,她只是想你了.只是想要你会来安慰她一下,哪怕是:乖,别闹了,听话!)
3 她说:不要感冒了./路上小心./自己多注意……
(不要嫌她烦.因为她知道你不傻,甚至是很聪明的.她只想让你知道她心里有你,她很想关心你)
4 她总说自己又长胖了或者长得不够漂亮.
(不要觉得她是在自卑或嫉妒别人,她只是怕自己在你眼中不够完美.她已经在为你改变了.)
5 她总说她想要帮你,要你有什么事一定要告诉她.
(其实她知道她帮不了你什么,她只想让你知道你还有她,她永远在会你身边陪你,会一直的支持你,)
6 她看到你跟别的女生亲近一些就会生气,发小脾气.
(别说她小气,不信任你,她其实是在吃醋,这表示她十分在乎你.即使心里难受也会自己安慰自己.)
7 无论做什么她总会征求你的意见.
(不是她没主见,太过依赖你,她只是尊重你,凡事以你为先.)
8 不管在哪里她总是紧紧的和你站在一起.
(她只是在告诉你她信任你.)
9 她爱忧伤,总是会多想.
(不要觉得她是想太多,只是有时她会觉得缺乏安全感.)
10 她假装生气转身离开.
(其实,她不是真的想走,只是离开的时候希望被挽留.)
11 她会突然冷淡你,或是向你撒娇.
(别怪她孩子气,她只是想让你哄哄她.)
12 也许有一天她会跟你说分手.
(其实,这个时候她已经喜欢你好久,只是不确定这份感情是不是对的.她只是要你的安全感,你的舍不得,你的不要走……）
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Wednesday
17 / 3 / 2010
I just remembered that I have your photo in my computer. It was really an old one, long before you went overseas to work. And I have another two photos of your screen shot. All those are really old memories, can’t believe I still keep them. I shall keep them longer.
I guess you’ve made a call for me by mistake today. So I’m sorry for the calls and messages that I’ve replied back. I thought you have things to tell me or something. But it’s okay; hopefully you’re doing well over there, and no longer feel upset. You know I want you to be happy.
Today is Wednesday. I remembered you liked Wednesday.
I miss you.
I just remembered that I have your photo in my computer. It was really an old one, long before you went overseas to work. And I have another two photos of your screen shot. All those are really old memories, can’t believe I still keep them. I shall keep them longer.
I guess you’ve made a call for me by mistake today. So I’m sorry for the calls and messages that I’ve replied back. I thought you have things to tell me or something. But it’s okay; hopefully you’re doing well over there, and no longer feel upset. You know I want you to be happy.
Today is Wednesday. I remembered you liked Wednesday.
I miss you.
Sunday, March 14, 2010
I'm Okay
I'm sorry that I try to put my hope on you.. I know I shouldn't have.. I'm sorry..
You said you're upset recently, and again I can't do anything about it.. You never allow me to help or even be there for you.. I'm really out of my wit.. Just tell me what to do and I'll do it.. So when you say stop contacting you through phone, I just do them for you.
I don't know why you're upset.. But I would very much love to help you.. You're like an important part of my life now.. I know this might sound crazy to you.. But seriously, five years ago when you entered my life with internet, you've somehow changed my perspectives towards life.. I have different views, different horizons, all because of you.. I never noticed them until you're so far away from me.. You may seem near, that we live in the same city, yet I feel so much more distant compared to last time when you're not here..
My dearest, I don't know how should I address you now.. I once called you my friend and my brother, and I was hoping that this relationship will elevate to another level. But I guess none of these would come true now. I wish the best for you, I hope everything turn out well for you..
And I want to tell you,
I'm okay, J.N., and I'll always miss and love you.
Jasmine
Thursday, March 11, 2010
I Need Help
I shouldn't go on like this, I know.
It feels like I have nothing in life now, and now I'm desperately seeking for something to hold on. I don't know how long this situation could last, I just hope that everything will be over, or perhaps I'm wishing for my life to be ended.
I hate this negative aura that surrounds me, but I can't seem to control them. I'm not looking all over for them but they always manage to come to my hiding place. I have no more place to hide, nor too tired to play hide and seek. I need a log in my pool of water, I need a saviour.
I don't want to make anymore mistakes. Any mistake could kill me now, easily. My shining stars dimmed, and I'm lost. Where are you when I need you the most?
It feels like I have nothing in life now, and now I'm desperately seeking for something to hold on. I don't know how long this situation could last, I just hope that everything will be over, or perhaps I'm wishing for my life to be ended.
I hate this negative aura that surrounds me, but I can't seem to control them. I'm not looking all over for them but they always manage to come to my hiding place. I have no more place to hide, nor too tired to play hide and seek. I need a log in my pool of water, I need a saviour.
I don't want to make anymore mistakes. Any mistake could kill me now, easily. My shining stars dimmed, and I'm lost. Where are you when I need you the most?
Monday, March 8, 2010
Act Accordingly...
to my instincts! =)
A few days ago I was in a depressed state. I was unable to understand myself nor the others, and I've decided to give myself a break from everything. As usual I skipped classes like mad and went out to have some fun. They were kinda costly, but I was happy. So fuck off all those worries that follow behind, heck care!
But reality still needs to come back and do their jobs. I need to be haunted by them in order for some progress. My research paper was hanging sky high, and I don't really know when do I have the mood to do them. But at least I already have an idea to do things, so I guess that's a plus point? *nodding in agreement*
And one thing about this crazy weekend, I went Kuantan based on my instincts!
I've been craving for real oceans and sands, and if possible some sun rise action. And I achieved them! Well not the sun rise because I was sleeping like logs at that time. But I get to shove my feet in real sands !! I swear I would go Kuala Terrengganu soon for some better beach on the spot. XD
And while typing I figure, this is actually my first blog post that become less emo. So I guess I'm getting better now, aren't I? =)
But friends keep tell me, maybe they need to slap me some times to make me awake. Do I really need those slaps?
Anyway I'm going to end this blog post with an emo note.
A few days ago I was in a depressed state. I was unable to understand myself nor the others, and I've decided to give myself a break from everything. As usual I skipped classes like mad and went out to have some fun. They were kinda costly, but I was happy. So fuck off all those worries that follow behind, heck care!
But reality still needs to come back and do their jobs. I need to be haunted by them in order for some progress. My research paper was hanging sky high, and I don't really know when do I have the mood to do them. But at least I already have an idea to do things, so I guess that's a plus point? *nodding in agreement*
And one thing about this crazy weekend, I went Kuantan based on my instincts!
I've been craving for real oceans and sands, and if possible some sun rise action. And I achieved them! Well not the sun rise because I was sleeping like logs at that time. But I get to shove my feet in real sands !! I swear I would go Kuala Terrengganu soon for some better beach on the spot. XD
And while typing I figure, this is actually my first blog post that become less emo. So I guess I'm getting better now, aren't I? =)
But friends keep tell me, maybe they need to slap me some times to make me awake. Do I really need those slaps?
Anyway I'm going to end this blog post with an emo note.
I've sent you messages today but seems like you didn't get to read them, or too busy to see. It's okay. I'll keep trying. =)
Friday, March 5, 2010
Unsend Message
I accidentally cut my left hand today.. So now I have a light red scar on it.. It's kinda pain when I have contact with water.. But I guess it will be fine.. Not a biggy anyway..
But I guess when it turn brown, or even gone, you won't be getting to see them..Maybe the next time you see me, I'll be perfectly heal, from head to toe.. Who knows..
I miss you.. Days without your voice are slow.. I hope you're doing fine over there.. Take care..
From: Jasmine
But I guess when it turn brown, or even gone, you won't be getting to see them..Maybe the next time you see me, I'll be perfectly heal, from head to toe.. Who knows..
I miss you.. Days without your voice are slow.. I hope you're doing fine over there.. Take care..
From: Jasmine
Monday, March 1, 2010
Whirl Pool
My mind now is spinning like a whirl pool.. Nothing is making sense now.. My heart pouding fast and hard.. It's difficult even to breath.. My chest is aching..
I know.. This should not happen.. But why?
I wish I can see you now..
Shit.. I miss you..
Take care..
March
In the beginning of the month I start to miss a person, carried from the previous month. I find myself can't stop thinking about him, I don't know why.
I wonder if I can turn my miss to action, so that I can see him in person. But I know it's impossible, I do not wish to intrude someone's life like that.
Hey, you there.
Do you know that you have messed up with my mind these few days? A simple message from you will soothe my nerves, a call for you would make me happy for the rest of the days.
But you're still so distant. I don't even know how to be connected to you. Or how to tell you what I actually feel about you. So if I tell you here. Do you mind? My blog don't have wide bunch of readers, so you should not be bothered about privacy.
I like you, a lot. You asked if I need more time, well I really don't. You asked if I can let go of that previous jerk, well I do. You asked if I could be your girlfriend, well I don't know whether your question is still valid or not, but yes I definitely want to.
I know both of us have doubts, especially you. You once said that we were so different, that you cannot see our future together. But what I would tell you, is that can we try to make things work? I'll try to catch up with you, I'll try to be part of your plan, I will not slow you down. But again, will you be with me when I need you? Will you be here when I say I miss you?
I really hope I would get a positive answer from you.
I miss you loads. I wish I could see you right now. But you said before you're busy this month. So I guess not. Take care.
I wonder if I can turn my miss to action, so that I can see him in person. But I know it's impossible, I do not wish to intrude someone's life like that.
Hey, you there.
Do you know that you have messed up with my mind these few days? A simple message from you will soothe my nerves, a call for you would make me happy for the rest of the days.
But you're still so distant. I don't even know how to be connected to you. Or how to tell you what I actually feel about you. So if I tell you here. Do you mind? My blog don't have wide bunch of readers, so you should not be bothered about privacy.
I like you, a lot. You asked if I need more time, well I really don't. You asked if I can let go of that previous jerk, well I do. You asked if I could be your girlfriend, well I don't know whether your question is still valid or not, but yes I definitely want to.
I know both of us have doubts, especially you. You once said that we were so different, that you cannot see our future together. But what I would tell you, is that can we try to make things work? I'll try to catch up with you, I'll try to be part of your plan, I will not slow you down. But again, will you be with me when I need you? Will you be here when I say I miss you?
I really hope I would get a positive answer from you.
I miss you loads. I wish I could see you right now. But you said before you're busy this month. So I guess not. Take care.
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