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Sunday, September 25, 2011


Wasn't really in my best of mood. Tonight will be the first night that I'm still awake after 12am since I've started working 2 months ago.

Got some really bad news, and was thinking life is really a bitch to everyone. Life comes and goes so easily and there's no way to predict. How can we mere humans take this? Sometimes I was thinking, if this is some sort of challenge from God, isn't it too over-whelming?

I am lucky that I do not have to endure all these loss and pain. But for those who had to around me, I felt extremely sorry and guilty. Who am I to deserve better treatment from God when I'm a worse person?

I am not proud of who I was, and there were so many things that I wished I had not done in the past. Though I don't ask for bad things to happen to me or my family, but I do not wish the pain to be endured by my friends.

If I could, I would take the pain.

If I could, I would switch place with them.

But who on earth would be this noble? All these are merely my emotions talking. But am I willing to actually do it?

I don't know.

I am a weak human being too. I can't take those pain and loss too.

All I can say is, be strong. I will always be at your side when you need me.